On Our Journey Home
 
Romance God's Way
Ed. 4, Vol. 11
1992 Subscribers
June 22, 2004
The Staci Stallings Newsletter

Table of Contents

The Light

Insights

Princess Chapters

Quote from on High

Let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.

-Galatians 6:9

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Wisdom of the Ages

Using things and loving people, that's the way it's got to be.

--B.J. Thomas

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A Life Question

Have I wasted any opportunities to turn my light on because I thought it would not be enough?

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The Light

Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.
Psalm 119:104

My dad always says that God doesn't put the light on your head so you can see way out into the future, He puts it at your feet so you can see the next step. While doing a walk recounting Jesus' journey to Calvary, I was with a large group of women. The walk began at dusk and continued as the light around us faded and slowly vanished.

The leaders had given each of us a battery-operated candle. A single light. I hadn't used mine most of the trip-preferring to walk the pseudo-journey up the Via Dolorosa in the dimming light as the world shut itself off around me.

Then as we rounded the curve after Jesus was crucified and on the way to see Him laid in the tomb, I realized that the older lady next to me was holding her candle closer to the walkway in an apparent attempt to see so she would not stumble. Immediately I took my candle out of my pocket and turned it on to help.

Unfortunately those candles were made to inspire the soul-not to light darkened walkways. My mind immediately said, "Gee, Stace, fat lotta good your puny little candle did." At that moment from directly behind me, someone turned on a mega-watt flashlight, and the whole walk lit up like a stage in a spotlight.

In that instant, I got it. I don't have to light the whole way for those around me. All I have to do is turn my candle on, and Jesus' light will be right there to back me up. I simply must have the courage to believe in His light rather than my own so that I never think that I have to do it all myself. It was a lesson I needed to hear, and one I'm eternally glad He sent me on a walk through the gift He gave me.


by: Staci Stallings
The Long Way Home






Insights

Sometimes you don't know what the Holy Spirit can do in your life until you are forced to rely totally on Him. This last week I got a first-hand look at what happens when my own strength, determination, and time are just not enough. I signed up to help at Vacation Bible School a couple of months ago. They told me I would be the Ambassador for Germany, which meant I got to teach the pre-school kids. I've done it before, and it has been a struggle.

I am convinced that God did not put me on this earth to teach little kids. They stress me out! All I do all morning is look at my watch and calculate how long it will be before we get to leave. So I was thrilled when the VBS director re-assigned me to the "Live Bible Stories" group--directing the teens who would stage the live bible stories. The only problem was I got the notebook of instructions on Monday, had sick kids until Thursday, finally met with the teens on Friday--only to discover that the "instructions" were sketchy at best.

In short, we had NOTHING to go on. No scripts. No props. No anything. We sketched out Monday's play, and I told them I would have some props together. Now one thing you have to know about me is that I am NOT artistic--never have been. Drawing stick-people is stretching my abilities. So when the Holy Spirit told me that it might be a good idea to use songs to make our "plays" longer, I quickly realized that we needed props to hide the speakers. Thus began the most recent week of my life that I had to rely totally on the Holy Spirit.

By Friday we had

  • Made walls for Damascus and Jerusalem

  • Convinced the kids that we had "lowered" our Paul down a wall in a basket without either lowering the basket nor so much as lifting him off the ground

  • Designed rocks to cover our speakers

  • Set up and got to work a four-speaker set up

  • Wrote 5 mini-skits about Paul's life

  • Found 11 songs to go with Paul's life

  • Designed 5 different sets--complete with rather elaborate props

  • Rehearsed and performed 5 different plays--performing each one 5 times per day

  • Received such great PR about our efforts that several adults at the church began coming to the performances

  • And even successfully sank a ship!

  • Best of all we became a team working to show Jesus to all 154 VBS kids.

    I've already asked to get to do this again next year although I did request that they give me more than a week to get ready. Even so, I know that everything will go much better if I just rely on the Holy Spirit like I was forced to this year. Sometimes it's good to remember just how much more you can do if you let Him do most of the work!

  •  

    Continuing...

    Princess

    All subscribers to "On Our Journey Home" are treated to reading a whole book by Staci just for signing up for the newsletter.

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    For your reading pleasure. . .

    The Long Way Home

    Chapter One

    "I wish I could go, John. But the Rothchild account's taking up so much time these days, I just can't," Phillip Anderson said, looking out his 37th story window onto the Chicago skyline as the phone dangled at his ear. "I know it's important, but now's just not good for me. Can't you go? … Yeah, I know…" He closed his eyes and sighed heavily. "Okay. Well, I'll see what I can do. Yeah, I'll get back to you… I will. 'Bye."

    The phone hit the cradle with a clang, and Phillip shook his perfectly-groomed head before looking across the expanse of desk into the questioning eyes of his son, Jaxton, who sat with pen poised, listening.

    "Bad news?" Jaxton asked indifferently.

    His father swiped the glasses off his face and frowned. "It's your grandfather again."

    Grandfather Snyder. During the past two months more than one conversation about him had bounced across the phone lines between Jaxton's parents in Chicago and Uncle John Snyder in Los Angeles.

    Phillip leaned forward, stressing the pinstripes of his silk suit. He squeezed the bridge of his long nose with two fingers. "That stupid man's going to ruin us all."

    "How could he do that?"

    "It's just the whole Kansas thing-you know how those people are. They wouldn't know an asset if it jumped up and bit them on the behind."

    "Mom can't talk to him?"

    "You know your mother. She wouldn't call him if the earth was going to spin off its axis," Phillip said in exasperation. "And John's not much better. He thinks someone should go down there and at least make sure the estate's in order, but do you think he'll go? No way. He'd sooner go to hell on an ice floe."

    "You can't get somebody in Rayland to look it over?"

    Phillip rubbed his temple with the edge of his glasses. "Are you serious? I wouldn't trust anybody down there with something like this. We'd really have a disaster on our hands then."

    Jaxton nodded, seeing in his mind his only brother, a few personal possessions in a box under his arm, boarding the elevator and slipping out of their lives three years before. "Too bad Blake isn't around anymore. He'd have been perfect."

    "Yeah, no kidding," Phillip said with a slight shake of his head.

    Jaxton dismissed the memory and looked back to his notes, already tiring of the subject. He tapped his pen on his notebook three times and then moved back to the real reason he was in the office on Memorial Day weekend. "So, what do you think about the Manning books? Did you get a chance to look at them yet?"

    ***


    Over the rolling green of the Kansas Flint Hills, the sky hung painted in color combinations only God could get away with. Periodically the scene outside the balcony doors caught her gaze, and Ami Martin would pause to take in its beauty for a moment.

    Beyond the nearly full-grown red cedar trees, the land stretched in an endless parade of emerald until it rolled right off the earth's edge. That land, this house, those trees-together they comprised the only true home she'd ever known. Even now with her life devoid of any real family, the safety of those hills enveloped her like a warm hug.

    She returned to her task, carefully pulling books off the shelf and stacking them onto the tiny coffee table. The books were a link-a precious, priceless link to the past. The sadness in her chest expanded with each volume she took down. How many times had she and Grandpa Martin sat in this room, the balcony doors open to the sunset beyond, reading the works of the great ones? Emerson, Thoreau, Keats…Even when she couldn't understand the words, he had seen fit to share them with her. In this room, sitting by his side, she could always pretend, if only for a moment, that this someone would never abandon her. That he would be there for her even if it wasn't convenient for him, even if she made his life more difficult, even if he didn't really like the idea-he would stay. That had been her one and only lifeline for 24 years, until last Thanksgiving.

    She pulled the black-bound Emerson anthology off the shelf and ran a loving hand over it. Even now if she listened hard, she could almost hear his low baritone lilting over the words.

    The sunset beyond the doors blurred, and she brushed a stray brown tendril out of her face. Slowly she dropped the book to the table.

    The wisdom of Grandpa Martin's years was tucked safely in her soul. However, as she pulled another volume off the shelf, she couldn't help wondering what his advice would be at this moment. It was true Grandpa Martin was only a simple farmer, but she knew in her heart that he had been much more than that. He was the only person who'd ever welcomed her into his home and insisted that she stay-no questions asked.

    Not even her mother had done as much. She had left before Ami was two, and her father wasn't much better. His decision to send her to Rayland wasn't about making her life more stable-it was about making his less complicated.

    She pushed that thought away. Don't think about him. Not here.

    Absently her hand ran the dust cloth over the book in her hand. If she could just hear Grandpa Martin's assurance that everything would be okay, then somehow she would have the strength to keep fighting. But with the money dwindling, and her father calling every other day to ask if she was ready to give up and simply sell the place, her determination was waning quickly.

    She pulled the Poe volume down and laughed softly. If only her scariest problems were ravens and casks of amontillado, as they had once been when she was tucked safely in the crook of Grandpa Martin's arm. Yes, this was the only place that had ever truly been home, and it was the place she wanted to spend the rest of her life-right here in Rayland, Kansas.


    ***


    "I know you've got Manning," Phillip said the next morning as he watched Jaxton pace the room in front of him, "but your mother and I discussed it, and it's the only thing that makes any sense."

    "You can't be serious about this," Jaxton protested. "What about Easley?"

    "Linda can take it."

    "Linda?" Jaxton raised a sarcastic eyebrow. "Easley'll bury her the first day, and you know it."

    "Okay, then we'll get Bob."

    In a slow crawl the room began closing in on Jaxton. "What about Chambers?"

    "Karen can handle it for a few days."

    Jaxton scrambled for any excuse that might change his father's mind. "Dawson. Now, you know I know more about that account than anyone else here."

    "Look, Jax," Phillip said, his voice suddenly hard as stone, "I didn't say I was happy about this, but Fowler called me again last night. He says the old guy's going fast. We need to get this done, and we need to get it done now. Uncle John can't go, your mother won't go, I can't go, and Blake's gone. So the next most logical person is you."

    Anger coursed through Jaxton, but, with one look at his father's rigid face, he knew better than to argue. He was the good son, and he wanted it to stay that way-although the thought of having to go to Rayland pulled him much closer to Blake's side of the table. But Jaxton was the one who would never question a direct command, and his father knew that as well as he did.

    "I really don't think it'll take very long," Phillip finally said, softening only slightly, and Jaxton felt the yank of the puppet string. "And I promise you'll get your accounts back the second you walk back through that door. Besides it's not like you can't keep in touch. You can take your fax and your laptop…"

    Jaxton laid a heavy hand against the wall, set his jaw, and examined the painting hanging there without seeing it. At one time, he could have discoursed for hours about the artist's brushstrokes and brilliant use of subtle back lighting, but now all he wanted to do was yank it from the wall and rip it to shreds.

    "So, that's it then?" he finally asked.

    "Here's your ticket to Kansas City." His father pulled the thin sheaf from the desk drawer. "Your plane leaves at two. It's a two-hour drive from Kansas City to Rayland. You can rent a car when you get to…"

    Jaxton didn' hear the rest of the itinerary. His mind pulsed with red hot flashes of anger, and a bright resolve to get this job done the quickest way possible so he could get back to his real life-back to something other than fields full of nothing but dust and old, worthless dreams.


    ***


    Ami surveyed her to-do list over her sandwich, marking each entry with a one through ten. The pickup sitting immobile in the garage received a one; painting the porch got a three; repainting the guest rooms, a four; hanging wallpaper, a five; cleaning the chicken coop, a two. By the time she got to the end of the list, she was exhausted. There was so much to do. So much to get ready before she could even think about putting her plan into action.

    She pulled out her calendar and check book and laid them on the table next to the to-do list. September 1, circled in purple, stared back at her. She had less than three months to get the place in order and a dwindling amount of funds to do it with. In March the money her grandfather left her along with the place had seemed like plenty, but it didn't take long for the bulk of it to evaporate.

    In frustration, she replaced the to-do list in the calendar and closed the checkbook. Sitting here worrying about it wasn't getting anything finished any faster. She carried her lunch dishes to the sink and ran water on them. The dishes could wait; the pickup couldn't....

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