My Timing is Perfect
|
"Make
me know Thy ways, O Lord; Teach me Thy paths."
--Psalm 25:4 |
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There
are days when I get really frustrated with man's place in religion. It probably
has to do with how and where I was brought up. In a little town with only
one church and one faith practiced, I didn't often see the edge of the power
of change that the hierarchy of a religious community can wield. Church
was the same; believers were the same; God was the same no matter where
I went. That's probably why all the changes the Church is making now upset
me so much. Growing up, my religion was as solid as my faith. Now, however,
I realize that the ideal I had always believed in back then simply does
not exist.
No, in this world people
want excitement and challenge. One way to stir excitement is by making changes.
Make a change, and suddenly everyone is compelled to take a stand on the
issue-for and against. The hierarchy then gains power by holding fast to
the change they have decreed. Eventually the multitudes surrender to the
change, which confirms who has the power. Until, of course, someone new
comes along and needs to make a change to reassert power, and the whole
process repeats itself.
| In the last few years, my religion has gone through many changes. We've been told that instead of kneeling at one part of the service, we are now to stand (then we went back to kneeling). We've been told that instead of only receiving Communion on the tongue it is now acceptable even encouraged to receive by hand. We've been told that children should no longer be Confirmed at 15 when they are able to make their own choice, it is now better to have them make their Confirmations as 8-year-olds because Confirmation cannot be "learned or earned." |
"She
is Mine, give her to Me, and whatever happens will be what I had envisioned
for her."
|
Of course my mind which
had to study for a year to be able to pass the test on the religious teachings
of the church in order to "earn" Confirmation wonders how we have
suddenly gone so far in the other direction. This concern was intensified
when my eight-year-old daughter arrived at this juncture of her life. I
had hoped and prayed, literally, that the rules would be changed back-as
some had said they might be. However, during our first meeting for second
grade parents, we found out it was not to be. The second graders would be
Confirmed as per the decree of the hierarchy.
For weeks I vacillated
between fury and bewilderment. I didn't understand why the religion I had
grown up with looked so different than the one I was passing on to my child.
I argued with people, asking why this change was made, and what my options
were in going forward. I couldn't figure out how I could ever be at peace
with myself if I took the central decision of my life away from my child.
But I also couldn't figure out how I would be at peace if it was God's will
and I stood in the way of that.
Then one night after
a meeting, my heart hurt so badly that I was near tears. I held my daughter's
hand as she drifted off to sleep and looking at her, I finally begged God,
"Please, I don't understand this. I know You know that I want what's
best for her, and I know what's best for Her is Your will. Please help me
to know what that is, and help me to be at peace with whatever happens."
Instantly a voice in
my head said very patiently, "My timing is perfect for each child.
She is Mine, give her to Me, and whatever happens will be what I had envisioned
for her." With tears rolling down my face, I did just that. I let go
of the control I had been gripping so tightly. For the first time, I had
true peace about not just Confirmation but about her whole life.
She's God's child, and
God will guide her life the way it is supposed to go. I'm God's child too,
and God's timing, if I let it be, will always be perfect for me just as
it will be for all of us-no matter what changes men make in the rules.
© Staci Stallings
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